Chapter 7
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The silence in the house, without Mrs Filan and Sister Johnson, was almost too much to bear, and Alice found the loneliness gnawing away for her. Shane spent his days at the studio to record their new album. After few day, Shane have something to discuss. There are a few things I want to discuss with you as well, Shane, "she said. "Our marriage, for instance, "she added when he glance at her strangely. "Ah yes….our marriage, he said. "Are you in hurry to end it? It's not that I'm in a hurry to end it, Shane, but we must come to some decision about what we're going to do. I can't sit, doing nothing with my life. "What would you suggest we do? "he asked. I suggest we discuss the possibility of having our marriage annulled some time in the future so I can get myself a job somewhere which would at least give me something with which to occupy my time." "Is that me talking, "she wondered and she wished that he would show some sign that he cared. "You don't , in other words, think we could make our marriage workout?" she heard his ask softly, and her mouth went dry. "I ---Shane, I' ---she said helplessly and stopped. "I did suggest it once, didn't I ? "Yes, but--- I thought--- I didn't think you were really serious.
I'm very serious about it and I hoping you would give me your answer. "Now ? " she asked as she swung round to face him. "You want an answer now ?" "Why not?" You've had enough time to think about it during these past weeks. "Do you---do you think a loveless marriage has any chance of succeeding ?" Shane's eyes flickered strangely as he came towards her, then, sliding his hand beneath her hair to the nape of her neck, he drew her towards him relentlessly and kissed her long and hard on the mouth until she trembled against him. "Does that answer your question ?" "What happen when I no longer attract you physically ?" "That's the future, Alice….., "he remarked softly. "What we're discussing now is the present." A real marriage carries with it certain responsibilities which can't always be ignored. "Before I give you my answer, Shane, there's something I have to tell you, "she began. "Well, I'm listening, he said. "Are you going to tell me or aren't you?" "Shane, I----" she broke off, passing her tongue across her dry lips before she tried again. "I told your nana the truth before she died." "You did what?" His harsh voice rasped along her already tender nerves. I told her the truth, she whispered. "I had to. She---" "You told her the truth about our marriage ? " "Yes, but----" "You gave me your word you would never tell her, I trusted you, "he interrupted her with a deadly calm that sent shivers up her spine as he towered over her, his eyes dark and frightening. "I know I gave you my word, Shane, but she----" You went against my wishes, he cut in, not giving her opportunity to show her the letter. "She wasn't un----" "I could kill you ! " he exploded as he seemed to swoop down on her. He dragged her against him with a force that choked off the cry that rose to her lips. "Shane----please----let me explain, "she grasped. "Explain ?" he roared, his chest heaving beneath her hands as she tried to push him away. You've explained enough!. "Shane, our marriage," she pleaded, her eyes filling with tears as the pain shot from her shoulders into her back and arms. "Our marriage is no longer of any importance to me, but you're not getting away with it that easy. "His grip on her shoulders. "You broke your word to me, "he said through his teeth. "Now I shall break mine." "No!, No, don't ! she pleaded her heart drumming so loudly against her temples that she felt faint as she tried to avoid his mouth. "Shane, listen to me. Please ! "I've listened enough, and it's no use fighting, Alice, because there's no escape for you. Not this time. "You're mad ! she cried as his lips raked her neck and shoulder. "Yes, I'm mad !" His hand tugged sharply at her hair, making her cry out in agony. She pummelled her fits against his chest, as he half dragged her towards the bed. His mouth came down on to hers with force that bruised her lips, and in the struggle the cord of her dressing gown had become undone. With a fierce tug Shane relieved her of her gown seconds before she felt herself fall backwards on to the bed with him pinning her down with his weight. "Let me go !" she cried, but her cry became a scream of terror as her nightdress was torn. "Shane, I beg of you, don't do this!" "Keep quiet ! " he said against her lips. With a last desperate effort she tried to fight him off, but her strength was puny in comparison to his. The tears ran unheeded down her cheeks as she felt the cruel touch of his hands on her naked body, and the bruising of his mouth. Alice awoke the following morning with the sound of someone moving about in the room next to hers. She was wide awake suddenly as she recalled what had happened the night before. "I shall hate and despire you as long as I live, "she had said, his lips tightly compressed, he had returned to his own room. After a hot bath a minutes later, she dragging her suitcase down from the wardrobe and packing a few essential items of clothing. With her suitcases in the hall and taxi, on its way, Alice went through to Shane's study and seating herself behind his desk, she drew his scribbling pad towards her. "Shane," she wrote, I'm leaving you, as I can't think you would want me to remain in your home and neither do I want to stay. I shall be going somewhere where I know I shall be needed, then you won't try to find me or see you again. I shall be grateful for the way you're helping Bruce. She scribbled her name at the bottom and found an envelope in the drawer, but the sparkling yellow diamond on her finger drew her attention. She removed both her rings from her finger and dropped them into the envelope before adding a post script to her letter. I'm enclosing the engagement and wedding rings you gave me. They were part of the farce we had planned, and it's a part of my life I want only to forget. Then she leaving the envelope on his blotter where he would find it the moment he came in, she hurried out to find her taxi waiting in the driveway. Less than an hour late stood looking about her hotel room. She had to unpack her things, but first she had to telephone Bruce and let him know where she was. "Bruce," she begain. I'm at the Gateway Hotel close to the municipal gardens. There was a silence at the other end before he said, "Yes", I know where that is, but what are you doing there?" "I'll explain, if you could come round and see me asap." Alice…is Shane with you ?" Alice fingers tightened on the receiver. "No". "There's nothing wrong, is there?" he demanded. "I can't explain on the phone, Bruce, she replied. "I'll be there as soon as I can. Alice put down the receiver and covered her face with her hands for a moment. She worked on the air-conditioner before a knock at her door made her push a tried hand through her hair before she went to open it. "Alice ?" Come in, Bruce, she said quietly, I'm sorry the room looks a bit of a mess but I only arrived a little over an hour ago, I haven't have time to sort things out yet. "Have you left Shane?" he asked as she closed the door. "Yes" she said." Why ?" he demanded with concert, but Alice shook her head and remained silent. "For heaven's sake, Alice, there must be a reason." My reasons are personal, Bruce, but I'm never going back. "Does he know yet that you've left him ?" "He'll know tonight when he arrives home. " He's such a nice guy, and I thought you loved him." "I…thought so too…once." She admitted. "Bruce…if he should ask for my address, promise me you won't give it to him ?" Please, Bruce ?" "Am I supposed to lie to him and tell him I don't know where you are?" Alice, you know he won't swallow that line." "I don't care what you tell him, as long as you don't tell him where I am." Bruce, I don't often ask you to do me a favour. Just this once, give me your promise ?" "All right, you've got it," he said after a long silence.
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Two weeks later Alice received a call from Bruce, asking her to meet him at the hotel and Bruce gave her the news of Shane's departure. They having a world tour in UK. "How----how do you know this ? she asked. "Well…" Bruce avoided her glance, I've been seeing him quite often lately." "You've been seeing him?" "Yes---I haven't any quarrel with him, Alice, and…as he's paying my university fees….." "When does he leave ?" He left last night. "Bruce informed her. "I…see." There's no need for you to leave here now, is there? Bruce asked. I'm afraid it's too late. I accepted a post as a theatre Sister at a surgical clinic in a place called Willowmead. "That's about a hundred kilometres from here. The he leaned towards her across the table. "Alice…about Shane." "Please !" "That's an episode that's all over and done with." "Not quite, "Bruce insisted stubbornly. "You still love him , don't you." "I shall always admire him as a good singer." "Is that all?" Bruce asked and Alice lowered her lashes to avoid his probing glance. That's all I'm prepared to say at this moment.
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